[berkeley]

demian
I finished Hermann Hesse's book "Demian," which is about the struggle against conformity in order to find and follow the path to one's true self.

Even when Emil Sinclair, the narrator, was only 10 years old, he sensed that he belonged to both the world of light (that is, the comforting world of his parents) and to that of darkness. He recognized that his fate led to more than a life limited to the world of light.

What i found most notable wasn't so much the inner struggle between light and darkness, but Emil's battle against remaining in a world of familiarity. He was afraid to accept and acknowledge the path to his true self because he did not know where it led. Safety lay in his mother's lap, in the warm living room where his family celebrated Christmas. Uncertainty lurked in the far reaches of his mind, questioning religion and morality.

Similarly, I too struggle with familiarity and uncertainty. The well worn path of security and predictability, in my case, is my internship. The uncertainty lies in my intent to pursue Art rather than Science. Working in a consulting firm will build my resume, but i imagine writing computer code all day and perhaps working overtime will prevent me from participating in more artistic endeavors.

As long as i continue to remind myself that corporate america is just a stop along the way, however, I should be able to stick to my photographic guns. I promise Corporate America will not be my final destination.

with that said
The preceding words smack of last summer's blog entries, so I suppose it would be good to show that I've grown up even a tiny bit since then. I don't mean to convey bitterness towards my internship. It'll be exciting to see what challenges will cross my path. Goodness knows last summer was a great experience and I miss my coworkers.