[apt. 6]

>>

what's that noise?
That was my waking thought as i slipped out of dreamland. What could that be? I thought the worst--some big rat was chillin' under my bed. Yes, last night as I walked into my building, a rat the size of my hand scurried out the door. I guess those freakin sticky traps that the landlord laid out probably aren't doing the trick...

Okay, so back to me in bed. *scratch scratch, scurry scurry*...I asked if Chris could hear that. And then of course, perfect timing, my alarm went off and I ran across the room to turn it off in hopes that whatever that thing was wouldn't attack me. Then i discovered, to my relief and dismay, that it was Babs--kathy's bunny. The rabbit had somehow found her way into my room during the night and decided she was at liberty to pee and poop on our carpet and eat a piece of my beloved Alvin Ailey Dance Theatre poster.

Anyway, chris and I were kind of upset, i was ready to do something irrational, but i wouldn't actually go through with throwing babs out the window because kathy could beat me up and throw me out the window to fetch Babs. haha.

Anyway, so those were the events of the morning.

on second thought
Hmm, i feel like what i've just written is so brilliantly insignificant that I can't just post this entry without acknowledging how petty the events of my life have been. Perhaps my writing is at a loss today because i just finished two hours of writing essays for my Anthro midterm about the implications of the Franciscan missionaries' enculturation program on Native Californians and the manner in which the Indians mediated these changes...blah blah blah--the story of my life.

Oh yeah, 6 midterms down, 2 more to go.

[apt. 6]

>>you and i must make a pact, we must bring salvation back<< somebody's "i'll be there" sung by mariah carey

break time
I've got 4 minutes til the end of my hour and a half break and then it's back to anthro...

more friends
I've decided i want to meet more people. That would mean changing my routine to incorporate new people. This is strange, I just read an article about how difficult it is to make a new circle of close friends. I didn't think it would pertain to me, but here i am. Well i suppose I don't plan on making a whole new circle of friends since i'm really happy with who i've got, but it would be nice to get a new perspective.

to do
i need to add a reblogger thing to this blog. When i changed the template a couple days ago, I was going to install reblogger, but the homepage for the service says that the comment thing doesn't work anymore. *Shrug* it works on everyone else's blogs...I'll look into it.

[apartment 6]

>>

goodbye weekend
This weekend was good times. I was a little stressed studying for a couple of midterms this coming week, but there were definitely fun things to say about these past two days too. The likha event was great, and gary took some cool pics of the event.

this is short, hehe, good night all. happy monday soon.

*posted at 1:03 am
**Check out the new blog title and blog description :o)
[apartment 6]

>>the feeling is fine, giving you everything of mine<< jordan knight's "give it to you"

heroes of heritage
Likha taught a dance workshop at UC Berkeley's Heroes of Heritage--a conglomeration of various filipino organizations celebrating flip culture.

It was good times, actually. It was great just being there with bern, bev, gary, fides, & manny and dancing. And of course after the dancing, the feast inevitably followed.
I'm still waiting for gary to post the pictures he took during the event. You'll get to see just how fun we are.

here
i'm drowning in you.
retreating into the solace of your being

i find the very thought of you inescapable.
Distracting myself with trained endeavor
inevitably returning to you, the thought of me
being beautiful

[slc]
blogging with bern thru blogbot

[apt. 6]

AIMing my blogs
blogger offers a new little service where you can blog through an IM window. Add "blogbot" to your buddy list and do a quick 2 minute setup and *ta-dahh* Whenever you want to blog, just IM the blogbot buddy and it's posted immediately.

[apt. 6]

testing bloggerbot
i'm testing bloggerbot right now.

[apt. 6]

>>can it be i'm staying away too long? did i leave your mind when i was gone?<< the jackson 5's "i wanna be where you are"

whoops
so i've been staying away from my blog and i apologize to the 4 of you who read this (bern, ms luzon, gary, and sometimes yvette).

Things have been busy as usual and with midterms coming up next week, i've been feeling especially unwilling to be efficient(!)...bad.

fun
One of my friends (Alex) got a hold of backstage passes + tickets to a michelle branch/lifehouse concert at the Warfield. So i'll be going to that tonight.

[apt. 6]

>>solo tu sabes bien quien soy, y por eso es tu en mi corazon<< shakira's "No Creo"


whoa
I've been going through a nice little stress rollercoaster and so i've neglected my blog. Things are cool now though, i've got my to do list to dig myself out of this hole of reading and problem sets.

bring it.

[apt. 6]

>>no music now

badass
As of yesterday evening, Alex has officially gained "badass mofo" status in my book. He can play absolutely any song he hears. He does jazz, funk, metal, acoustic. I was in awe.

When it rains
Chaos rules my roommate's world as of yesterday evening.

I remember the homily for Sunday's mass. The priest was talking about how important it is to be grateful for everything we've been given. Of course my retelling just makes Father M's homily sound cliche, but he delivered it well and made me take a step back and appreciate my little sister the genius, my family's health, and (hehe) my mom folding my laundry.

Also
So strange. I was also thinking in church about how i analyze the homily on the drive home and focus on the changes I need to make, but throughout the week I completely forget about the lesson. Before i know it, it's sunday again and the focus is on something new.

For the past 19 years (almost 20!) i've been attending mass and have heard pretty much all of the gospel readings, yet somehow I don't actively apply them to my life so that I go out into the world living like Christ. That is to say, if I was really paying attention at church and making a real effort throughout the week, homilies on Sunday would be useless because I'm already taking care of my business. Rather than thinking about my flaws during and after mass, ideally my thoughts should be "haven't i heard this one already?".

But i suppose that's why I need to go every Sunday.

[apt. 6]

>>don't turn around, i don't want you seeing me cry. just walk away...i'm letting you go<< ace of base's "don't turn around"

Responding to Gary
Gary posted a comment on my blog from Wednesday evening. He said that my bloggage shouldn't be an effort-- he gave up trying to change things with his site content.

I've never written my blog with an intent to influence anyone. One of the purposes of this blog is to produce a record of some of my thoughts--whether petty or non-trivial-- and later go back and read the various stages i've been through. So, to be honest, this is definitely a selfish endeavor.

Hellooo friday
This weekend holds many possibilities and I'm looking forward to them. I could go into all the things i'd like to do, but then i'd take up more time talking about it rather than doing it. So this weekend's goal is to do something awesome and write about it on Sunday. Can't be that difficult, right?

[berkeley]

>>it's not like you to say sorry, i was waiting on a different story, this time i'm mistaken<< nickelback's "how you remind me"

content
Christian updated his blog and as usual, it's witty and thoughtful. Reading his post reminded me of how my posts had more content back in the summer. I'd been reading a book about the history of San Francisco and had also been documenting my 10 week foray into corporate america through an internship with Accenture. I was full of things to rant about, putting most of it into my blog.

i think my posts at present lack that reflection on life--that drive to comment and to change things. Lately, nothing i've posted has really been meaningful, and quite frankly, i doubt any of what i've been writing has been amusing. Would i read my blog if i came across it? Would it make me want to change me or the world?

Stupid school. Time to go back to studying soon. That's got to be the reason why my posts have been altogether content-less. But why go to school if i'm not enriching myself? (well, not enriching part of me).

The question is simple, but its answer is complicated. I go to school because i like learning about energy eigenfunctions, curvilinear motion, and california cultural anthropology, but studying these things prevents the cultivation of other pieces of me. What about photography...folk dance...

School now (left-brain now), right brain later. I don't really like that. Fuckin' compromises.

[berkeley]

>>i drove myself insane wishing i could touch your face, but the truth remains<< nsync's "gone"

rollercoaster
All that stuff they say in fitness articles surrounding the "diet rollercoaster" is all truth. I've got to be one of the many living examples of it. The term diet in my case does not mean eating salad and skimping on everything that doesn't come straight from the ground. Diet for me simply means what I'm eating :: so x-nay on the negative connotation.

My point :: I've been exercising consistently since April 2000. I've exercised 5 days out of the week since November 2000. Two months ago, i changed the objective of my strength training routine from building strength to focusing on definition...Blah blah blah, so the point is, i'd say i'm satisfied with my exercise habits. Getting closer to my goal, however, has led me to falsely conclude that i've earned my share of bad food...thoughts like "hey, one of my friends said i've got guns, so that means i get to have a hamburger and a bunch of chocolate pretzels...

stupid "bad food" deprivation is making me take steps away from progress.

[apartment 6]

>>i live in a town, where you can't smell a thing<< radiohead's "subterranean homesick alien"

bottom's up
I just came home from my old roommate's birthday party. It was fun, not one of those parties with too many people where even your friends seem like strangers. As usual, i remained sober--i have yet to understand why I never feel inclined to drink (even a little) when liquor is present and free for the taking.

I arrived around 10pm, the party was still warming up. I talked with Adela. She'd get up periodically to imbibe some redbull topped vodka. She continued her story about school--she wanted to go into medicine--be a brain surgeon in fact, but, skipping all details, she was going to be an X-ray tech. Tough time growing up she said. It was amusing to see her transition from composed sobriety to drunken happiness. I wonder what it's like to be drunk. Adela said she could see two of me.

[apt. 6]

>>i know i may be young, but i got feelings too. And i need to do what I feel like doing<< Britney Spears' "I'm a Slave 4U"

tick-tock
restless me. I've got lots to do, but none of it is something i actually want to do. Anything that requires more than two neurons is at the bottom of my list right now. Wow, i wonder what that says about this blog, haha.

i gave my best friend a call-- no answer. Called three people in berkeley, 2 not home, one packing for San Diego for the weekend. Irony. Guess i'll do some homework.

willsantos.com
I got this guy's website from gary. Will's site used to be really different--super advanced. Had his thoughts, a little window for his webcam, tons of content all about will santos' world. all kinds of stuff that go along with those super advanced websites that show that the owner really knows their shit. I know i can't describe it well, because you just have to see it to know what i'm talking about.

In any case, his site is completely different. No pictures, just words. Maybe he'll add more eye candy later, but for now, it's just a story about a guy who's going to meet at a girl at Immigration at an airport in Hong Kong.

What would ever incite someone to completely revamp their site? A personal website is a reflection of its owner, thus, changing the site the way Will did means he's trying to take himself in a new direction. I wonder where he's going.

[apartment 6]

>>

hat's off
My dancer's hat, that is. After an agonizing few weeks, I've finally decided, officially, that I won't be dancing this season for likha. My mom's always told me that I can't do everything at once, and I've always tried to prove her wrong, but *sigh* as usual mom's right again. I know that it's not a matter of whether or not I have enough time--because everyone has time if they want something bad enough. In my case, i was choosing between photography and likha :: and I wanted photography more. I want to improve my photography skills while I'm in college and I figure Likha will still be going strong if not stronger 2 years from now-- if and when i get my BS in may 2003. So there it is.

Decisions are so much easier once they've been made.

[apartment 6]

>>did you ever think that you would be this rich?<< R Kelly's "did you ever think?"

new link
Check the link to the left [ms. luzon], another dancer at likha created a blog. It took me a few days to figure out who it was, but, ha! I know now.

killing me
blargh. I'm vegging for a bit before i hit the books. Can't wait til wednesday is over, no more midterms for the week (2 this week). Enough about school.

I went to foot locker to find a pair of running shoes, but it was to no avail. Cool thing, did happen though. A random guy in the store gave me a 30% off coupon, so I gave it to James so that he could use it towards his new fangled sandals and socks for his birthday.

what say you?
It's got to be one of the most annoying things to love everything about a person except for their looks. I was just thinking about this guy back in high school who was totally amazing and fun to be around. I totally felt connected to him, except that i wasn't physically attracted to him. If one could have put his personality and genius into a different body, i would have been totally head over heels-- ahh memories. back in the day.

I know it's terribly superficial, but i guess i'm too stubborn. I don't think it's wrong that a guy should pass the "i think you're hot" test before he can be considered a potential. *sigh* 2 years later, after all the growing i've done in college, I still agree with my opinion about this topic. Crazy random. I don't know why i'm talking about this. I was thinking of deleting this paragraph, but after all that writing, i'll leave it in.

If you guys would rather me write about tomatoes or the seasonal harvesting cycle of the Maya, just hit the react/remark button below.

[berkeley]

>>pink, cuz you are so very...cuz today it just goes with the fashion.<< aerosmith's "pink"

woo hoo
i've decided i need new shoes. rejoice. new shoes for the gym. I've had the other ones for about a year and they don't really match my newer athletic shorts, tanks, etc.>> yay for being a girl.